Fasting is not a diet

Assaalamu alaikum dear brothers and sisters in Islam !

Today I want to adress something that bothers me for quite a while now. Asthere is - finally ! elhamdulillah ! - Ramadan coming, the issue of fasting pops up for muslim communities. I am so excited for the three month ! May Allah grant us all a blessed intense month of Ramadan ! A month full of understanding and barakah <3

During the last year I experienced a lifechanging Ramadan. It literally changed me from head to toe. It changed my outlook on life, it gave me inner piety. I dont know how to put it into words, but I guess for the first time in my life my heart was completely filled with the love of Allah . It was completely pure, free from any negativity, from any wordly desire. I was free, seeking only Allahs pleasure. Subhanallah ! Ya Allah grant me and the Ummah one more Ramadan like that ! 

Afterwards I started fasting mondays and thursdays, according to the sunnah of our prophet, to create my own little Ramadan at least twice a week.
It is great to keep you going, to keep you busy, but its not even comparable to Ramadan. Not at all.So I learnt to appreciate Ramadan even more.

Modern muslims dont pay much attention to the three month except for Ramadan. But thats not what I want to talk about today. The issue I want to address is much bigger, a lot more important. It is about pure intentions.


We all know that deeds are judged by intentions, that it is the heart, the inner dimension of a deed that defines its worth.So we want to recheck our intentions over and over again.We want to ensure, that our deeds are for ALLAH and ALLAH only.

And we want to get rid of anything else.We do the deeds,because ALLAH wants us to do them, and as we love HIM our only struggle is to please HIM.So we do it in order to please HIM and not to benefit from it on a worldly basis.There is a lot to talk in this field of pure intentions, but as Ramadan is just around the corner I want to talk about one thing, that corrupts a lot of peoples intentions during Ramadan.


We fast.During this time we dont eat, dont drink, have sexual intercourse, fight,curse anyone etc. . We stay away from haram and even from some halals .

As we stay away from food and drink we lose weight.Naturally.Most people are extremely happy about that.No problem at this point, right ? Wait, its coming .

As we know that we can expect weightloss we look forward to Ramadan to slim down.Why do we want to slim down ? To appear prettier, to appeal to PEOPLE.So this becomes one of our motives for fasting and we automatically -without awareness- put PEOPLE in our hearts.We corrupt our intentions
.What was once for the sake of ALLAH only , becomes now a splitted thing.It is for ALLAH yes, but also for people ,
 or ourselves, our husbands, wifes or whatever.It doesnt matter at this point really. What matters is, that there is something or someone else you do it for.


1) Ban your dare
For the time of Ramadan just dont use it, or better put it in some shelf.Dont control your weight.Just dont.

2)Big Mirrors
Dont try to replace your dare with your Mirrors.If there are big Mirrors in your room, put some fabric over it  and make a habit of not staying in front of mirrors too long.Not longer than 40sec, to check your clothing.

3)Shopping
Dont go shopping for clothing during Ramadan.Firstly there is a lot of things you could spend your time instead of shopping and secondly shopping for clothing will make you judge your body.Our prophet said

"Many people dont get anything from fasting except hunger and thirst,and many people who pray at night get nothing from it except weakfulness." (Al-Bukhari). Leave the unneccessary out.

Ramadan is a month full of Barakah, you really cant efford wasting this time.

4)Lose clothing
In fact, this should be selfunderstanding, but unfortunately its not.I started wearing only Abayas since 3 month, and im more comfortable than ever before.

" O children of Adam! We have indeed sent down to you clothing to cover your shame, and (clothing) for beauty and clothing that guards (against evil), that is the best. This is of the communications of Allah that they may be mindful." (7/26)

May Allah grant us all the most intense and heartchanging Ramadan <3

May peace be upon you <3 

hüsn-i hat

I admit. I  hate  dont like art. On its own.

In my eyes art has never been something worth my while.I just couldnt see any sense in sitting down for hours and drawing, I always thought, that I was going to be asked   about where I spent my time  on the day of judgement.

But lately I was introduced to the ancient ottoman art of "hat", which changed my outlook on art completely !

The ottoman art "huesn-i hat" means art of line. Its about writing arabic letters as beautiful as possible.
I started attending a course in my local mosque a few month ago and it turned out , that I really liked it ! At first I thought "youre going to waste your time there Ayse!You are going to be asked about this!" But then it was introduced to me as a form of ibadah.

The "hattat" (writer, calligraph) is supposed to be in a constant form of remembrance of Allah as he is writing. This is why every calligrapher has to start with the dua

"My Lord facilitate , dont complicate for me. Give me goodness in my work ! "

And you can only take satisfaction and joy from this incredibly patiency requiring art if you remember Allah while writing. 
Hüsn-i hat is not only the artwork you see at the end on the paper. It comes with a whole mindset.
A mindset of modesty, of humbleness and awareness of your the finiteness and irrelevance of your ego in comparison to the greatness of Allah and the concept of Islam.

You are supposed to write this until you are perfect at it. For some it might take years...
And dont be fooled, it might look easy, I love it, but the true masters of this art are never satisfied with their own works. How could they be with yours ! :)

Every letter has its own measurements, which depend on the thickness of your pen (a bamboostick, called "kamis") :) 

The ink is made out of soot, which is beaten up to 500.000 times by hand to refine it as much as possible.

Having ink made out of fine soot is important to prevent a streaky appearance. 

The process of beating the soot is called "terbiye etmek" which means edifying. The whole art is practiced with the purpose of edifying the calligrapher.May it be in patience, in discipline, accuracy or consistency...

My "hoca" (my teacher) is one of the most humble people Ive ever met. He told me, that before he started with calligraphy he used to be a very irascible person.Always in a rush, quick to act.

Hüsn-i Hat had made him patient, quiet, humble.

And it is doing the same with me. Alhamdulillah! 

I now love spending my evenings with the art of hüsn-i hat...

A hattat has to spend his life fighting his ego in order to dissolve himself in the love of his creator.He has to purify his heart in order to become nothing more than a sharpened sword of his Lord. To let his ego die to be  a lover of the Prophet (pbuh). To forget about himself in order to be a soldier on the way of Allah. 

The biggest enemy he has on this road is himself.

                               
                                         one of the best documentaries about hüsn-i hat (turkish) :)

                                                                   

                                                                     Stay humble <3 

                                                          Be in constant remembrance <3 

Finally..the short hijabtutorial

I received  SO MANY requests about how to do the turkish hijabstyle and always promised I would do a video. I am sorry it took like...half a year or so . whoooooops ^^ excuse me

You will be molested with music, you mayt not like, just turn off the audio :)     click here to watch 

benefitting from the blessed early hours

During the last weeks I established a new morning routine for myself. I was planning this for a long time, but I never really had the strength and willpower to put it into action .

I now wake up a lot earlier.To be a little bit more accurate : at 4:30 am .

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

“The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said: ‘O Allah, bless my Ummah in the mornings.’ 

[Abu Dawud, Tirmidhi, Ibn Majah]

No I am not kidding.It is in fact one of the best habits I´ve ever developed! And I recommend it to absolutely everyone out there ! <3

Now lets have a quick look, at what my mornings usually look like :)

4:30 am 

My phone is telling me to wake up with the most nervewracking tone I could find.I take it and there is the snooth-Button.mmmhhhh looks so tempting to press it right now.Just 5 more min! Just 5 min, right?

But we all know, that it is those 5 min in which you either wake up to have a great productive day or just sleep for several hours...

So dont cheat.Get up.
I go to the bathroom, take wudu and go back to my room to pray.There is nothing better to start off your day than with prayer and dua.
Afterwards you should be completely awake. At least I am. ;)

4:50 - 5-30 am 

Now I´ll usually go downstairs and straight into the kitchen.

The first thing I´ll do is drinking a glass o water and then drinking a few drops o black cumin oil, according to the sunnah of our prophet.

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

“The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said: ‘O Allah, bless my Ummah in the mornings.’ [Abu Dawud, Tirmidhi, Ibn Majah]

Im a huge breakfast-fan and never go out without eating something. So I prepare something nice for myself, which usually is a huge bowl of fruits with oatmeal and milk.

The breakfast is my biggest meal of the day.I just combine every sort of fruit I can find. 

A typical Ayse-breakfast :

1 apple                  10 grapes

1 banana                 handfull of almonds or walnuts

1 Orange                a few raisins

1 mandarin              oatmeal and milk 

Then I will just grab my newspaper or the book I am currently reading and read it.With the oatmeal-fruit-combo I´ll usually have 1,5 l of tea and a few glasses of water.Afterwards Im usually quite full and dont feel hungry anymore.A lot of people told me, that I eat extremely big portions for a girl my size and for that time of the day.Well yes, thats true,but I eat healthy food and am used to eat much for breakfast, so if you arent much of a breakfast-type I can understand your point here. But you should definitely fill in the tanks with some carbohydrates in the morning :)

5.30-6.30 am

Now its time to exercise ! Dont be like the girl on the right, when you read the word "exercise". Its important.It makes you feel great.It prevents sickness and injuries of every sort.

And the most important thing is: Our bodies are just borrowed, they´re just vehicles we use for our souls.So your body has certain rights.And its first right is to be looked after.

Be thankful for your body, it does whatever you would like it to do for you.

And just look how much mercy Allah had, when he created us and arranged it for us, that we would keep our bodies healthy through mere usage of it! Subhanallah ! 

It doesnt really matter which exercise you do , as long as it suits the needs of your body.

I personally like rope-skipping, jogging and every type of cardio. Unfortunately I am injured.My left knee has a whole in the cartilage.Thats the reason, why I cant jogg that much and have to do muscle-building exercises for my legs, to support the injured cartilage. 

I had three surgeries for my knee, it was and is horrible for such an active person like me, so I take care. I really really really dont want to undergo surgery a fourth time. 

6.30-7.30 am

Well after having a good workout I go into the shower. That takes around ten minutes. Then Ill pray one more time and start preparing for the day.It can happen, that I just forgot to do some homework, which Ill do then at this time.After snacking on something little and making dua the last time Ill leave for school :)

 Prepare for the day . Make sure u dont forget your hijab :)

I benefitted so much from waking
 up early. 
I used to be this person :

Never again insaallah! 

When others are still sleepy and tired, I am in a good mood  and awake!

So go ahead and set your clock to an earlier time than usually :)
And tell me what your morning-routine looks like ! Im curious about your mornings ! :)

May peace be upon you <3

To the moroccan menfolk...

Tears...Tears on my face, my skirt, my blouse...Tears running down my cheeks, falling down from the tip of my nose onto the already soaked carpet..Tears on my fingertips, running down my lips and falling on my knees.. Light is falling upon me. I am in morocco. It´s Juma-time. It´s the last prayer I am performing in a muslim country.Outside the mosque, on the Jamaalfna are men standing in rows. They do the Jumaaprayer together in the burnig sun of Africa. The womensection is empty. I am alone.Left on my own with my creator.
Love and greatfulness is overwhelming me.While others struggle to survive I am having nice holidays at schooltime.I am in a muslim country and in less then a few hours I will be getting on board of the airplane, which is going to take me back to the colds, the winds and snowbound landscape of Germany.I am thankful to perform one of the most intense prayers of my life.I cry. I repent.I feel liberated.

Salah is over.I sit there.I think.I make dua.I cry...

As I go out, a few young men are standing in front of the mosque. The men , who showed me and my friend the mosque is in their rows.They are smiling and talking to me and my friend.As you may understand I am not really in the mood to talk to anybody in that moment.My face looks swollen from crying,my sight is still blurry and even for a non-believer it is quite obvious, that I am mentally not present. I feel detached from the world and understand the words the young men is telling me, but not the sentences, when my friend suddenly becomes angry.
They are asking for facebook.If I am looking for a spouse.
A few minutes later, when I am finally able to realize, what happened I decide, that I have enough of it.It makes me angry , and it makes me feel bad about myself.


Wonder what I am talking about ? Molesting women !

Before I  went to morocco I was filled with hope, that this trip would give my spirituality a boost like nothing else.Obviously I was expecting a country full of practicing muslims, where Islam was in the hearts of the people and in their everyday-life.I had forgotten, that for the morroccans Islam was not some decision they someday in their lifes made.It was more like tradition.Selfunderstanding. Nothing special anymore...


So my expectations were up to the sky.There was no other option than disappointment.
But what was the reason for my disappointment?Partly it was the empty mosques at prayertimes.It was the obvious desire of the people to westernize their country, showing on the surface through their clothing, their music, their habits, their eating, their style of talking to each other.It was that I wasnt prepared to hear the short , makamless prayercall in morocco , when I was expecting to wake up to a loud, long, heartmelting prayercall for fajr .  Reality was hard for me : I had to set my clock for fajr, I had to fight against resistances to go to the mosque in the desert or on the way I had to pray on my own. No one there to pray? In a muslim country?! Alhamdulillah there was my friend !

 Koutoubia-mosque in marrakesh


But the most shocking and disturbing thing has been one thing there : MEN and their behaviour towards women.


Men in morocco are incredibly molesting !!! They harass women, whereever they see one.I dont know, if there are good reasons for it, but there are for sure good reasons AGAINST it :

1) Its unislamic

 Nothing much to explain about that point I guess.

2) It makes women feel bad about themselves

Of course, there are women, who feel good, when men stare at them.But most of us dont.We REALLY DONT WANT YOU TO DO THIS.When we shop, we just want to shop.When take pictures, we just want to take pictures.When we go to the mosque, we just want to be with the almighty.We dont want to be asked, if we are looking for a spouse,we dont want you to say "Masaallah" ,"Beautiful" or whatever with a disgusting undertone,we dont want you to walk after us, turn your heads,whistle, beep in your cars,stop in the middle of the street to smile disgustingly or even move your eyebrows OK ? Just STOP IT !
There has been this one street in Casablanca, where I had one of the worst experiences I´ve ever had in public. We just walked down the street, and without an exception EVERY SINGLE HEAD in that street turned around,smiled,called us names.We, as 4 young women, two of us wearing long dresses and being hijabed, felt after 2 minutes as dirty and guilty as if we had done something wrong.

3)Women dont like you , if you act this way

When you ask a young women, who OBVIOUSLY is a tourist, if she is looking for a spouse, what do you think she is going to do ? What do you expect her to do ? She is going to leave your shop,leave the place you are in, and feel uncomfortable.
Women in your environment arenot going to like you, and then, when you become serious in marrying someone,no woman will be there to marry someone, who molested EVERY woman, he saw.

4)She probably is married or going to be married soon

This is just for people, who persist in talking, even if the woman is obviously uncomfortable.

I dont know how to explain , how BAD it feels, when you are molested.It´s  on of the worst situations out there, especially if you are a very kind person and dont want to hurt anyones feelings or raise your voice in public.Its even worse,if you hate to make a spectacular out of yourself.

So PLEASE MEN ! Please, for the sake of Allah  stop it !

May peace be upon you <3

Impressions from morocco

I´ve been to morocco for a week ! It was amazing and gave me so much new impressions and I really liked Marrakesh, where I spent most of my time :) Travelling is such a great way to learn !

 I stayed in the Amani Residence in Marrakech. I can recommmend it without any doubts, it was great. If I ever visit Marrakech again, I will go to the same hotel !

 

 




Casablanca and its mosque Hasan II. ..

   

 Lets LOL together at this pic of me.Looking like walking death.All the travelling obviously got me xD

I also made a trip to the desert...

 There is no better place for praying, than the under the stars of the desert...

 It was not only fun, but I enjoyed it alot.Dont know, why the camera is making the pictures so bright -_-

I want to visit the place again....One day insaallah <3

                                    May peace be upon you <3